Van Driver

Dave, who works for a delivery company makes a regular run between Liverpool and Manchester. Every day it is the same route, same view etc.

To break the monotony and to bring some excitement to his journey he devised a little game to play on the way.


Every time he saw somebody wearing a Man U shirt or scarf, he would mount the pavement in his van and run them over?.. (Ok, you guessed it, he is a Liverpool supporter)


Over the weeks he had a very good running total.


One day, as he was just leaving the outskirts of Liverpool he spotted a priest standing by his broken down car. Being a caring type of person (except when it came to Man U supporters) he stopped and offered the priest a lift. The priest gratefully accepted the offer and settled himself down in the van?s passenger seat.


As they approached Manchester Dave spotted one of the many styles of Man U shirts being worn by a knuckle dragger walking along the road.


Narrowing his eyes, he accelerated, flipped the steering wheel to the left, mounted the pavement and bore down on the hapless idiot.


As he was about to flatten said knuckle dragger, Dave remembered about his passenger and very quickly swerved away and back onto the road. As he did so he heard a bang and looking back in the mirror saw the crumpled figure of an ex-Man U supporter.


Apologising profusely to the priest, Dave stammered ?I?m sorry Father, I thought I had missed him?. To which the priest replied, ?So did I my son, but I got the fucker with the door?.
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